Crash Test Dummy

So, this weekend I inherited another nickname, given to me by my best friend (besides "stalker"), which is "Crash Test Dummy". It's not really a subject to joke about considering I'm lucky to be untouched.

I had an eye opening experience and literally I mean "eye opening" because this accident is a result of me somewhat falling asleep at the wheel. Let's just say school and work took a toll on me that night. My whole purpose of getting out of this state was to relax, spend time with family and friends, and shop!! I didn't come close to any of those. If I only had a cocaine problem then I wouldn't be in this predicament. One huge rail would have kept me awake the whole time. But unfortunately all I do that keeps me energetic, is large amounts of red bull and the occasional sexual rendezvous ( too bad that's only occasional). It might've helped if I got a little riled up before my drive.

I'm just glad to be back home safe and sound. And since this was a life changing experience, I want to give my Academy Award Speech.

"I do want to say thank you to the officer that stopped and ticketed me, the cute guy named Leonard that stopped to comfort me, the drunk native americans that tried to help, the ambulance that passed right by me, the tow truck dude that picked up the parts of my car, Maricopa County for making such reliable property (guard rail), my best friend that woke up at 1am to relieve me of my stress, and Nissan for making a damn good little sports car that saved mine and my son's life".